Sometimes I want to feel like drowning in my tears and complicated mind. I am exhausted. I feel like giving up on my own self. But, this is what it is: life. The worldly life; the prison; the place where I don't belong.
How could I expect everything to be good if this life had been stated as a prison by Rosulullaah?
Human being's problems are different one to another. For me, it is my own complicated mind and soul that sometimes make me in trouble. But, I have to be grateful for He has given me with so many blessings. Therefore, I just have to be patient.
و اصبروا إن الله مع الصابرين
“…and be patient. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.” [al-Anfal 8:46].
No matter how many times I feel like giving up on my self, I will not. Because I love my self, for the sake of Him. It is okay to be like this. It ain't against humanity. It is not a sin. It is just me and my complicated mind: a blessing from Him. It is okay not to trust anyone because.. I trust Him with of all of my heart. He is always there for me at my lowest point of life. He will not leave me. and He loves me, for who I am. He is all I need. He loves me. Allaah Ar-Rahmaan Ar-Raahiim.
In the name of Alloh Jalla Jalaluhu,
Dear my own self,
ولا تهنوا ولا تØزنوا
“So lose not heart nor despair…” [Al ‘Imran 3:139]
