Nidi's online diary.

Best of mankind

Disaat mereka dahulu melihatnya, mereka selalu mengatai beliau:
Orang gila!
Penyihir!
Dukun!
Pendusta!
Mereka menyangka dengan cara itu mereka bisa melenyapkan agama yang beliau bawa.
Alangkah kasihannya mereka...
Mereka telah meninggal..
Dan hari ini, pengikut beliau tersebar memenuhi dunia.

Ya Rosulullaah (shollallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam),
Semoga aku (dan muslimin yang lain) bisa tegar di atas sunnahmu T_T
Semoga dihilangkan oleh Alloh rasa sungkan dalam beragama
Semoga gak malu dengan ke-islamannya
Semoga gak takut dijudge apa-apaan lagi sama society
Semoga tetap terjaga dari segala fitnah zaman

Dear a super strong leader who shed a tear for his ummah, Wait us in telaga kautsar........... aamiin.

Dia yang layak menerima penutup nubuwah
bercahaya dan dipersaksikan Allah sebagai kepercayaan
asma Nabi dipertautkan dengan asma Ilah
tatkala mu'adzin menyerukan adzan lima kali berkumandang
asmanya diambilkan dari asma-Nya yang terhormat
Penguasa Arsy yang terpuji dan ini adalah Muhammad
(diambil dari buku raudhatul muhibbin-nya Ibn Qayyim Al-Jauziyah)

Anyway read comments on https://www.facebook.com/talkislam/photos/a.161532850603854.36854.161530600604079/918904271533371/?type=3&theater deh, sediihhh :__)

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, by Khoirunnida

In random,

As-sa'iid

فيا أملي ويا سكني

ويا انسي وملهمتي

يطيب العيش مهما ضاقت الايام ان طبتي

Hahahahhaa baca kitab macam ni kalo lagi gak ngerasa apa-apa emang super awkward.
It's like....... cuma bisa ketawa-tawa sendiri WKWKW.
Sepertinya penekanan orang-orang yang baca buku ini tergantung situasi hatinya.
Kalo orang yang kosong kayak gw sekarang pasti ngambil hikmahnya tentang hubbuddunya bukan hubbu hubbu lainnya huahahaha.

Todaaay bahasa arab lagi setelah 1 bulan lebih pause karena syakit *yaq lupa semua deh tuh kaidah*
Kapan ya Ya Alloh bisa bahasa arab lancar. Kapan ya bisa punya kemampuan 5 bahasa. Ya sejauh ini sih udah bahasa indonesia, enggres, bahasa kalbu, bahasa baper, bahasa alay :__)
Udah gitu aja.

فلا تعصي إلهك وأطعه

دواما علّ تحظى بالقبول

0Comments

, by Khoirunnida

In life and dreams,

Your mommy and their first daughter

Hi,I wanna talk about something unrelated to recent hot topics. I just wanna write what's on my mind right now.

Soooo, tadi siang gue menemukan FB tetangga gue yang dulu tinggal di samping rumah, ka devi dan ka deva. Yup, mereka kembar! Dulu, ka deva dan devi ini punya adek namanya Winda yang seumuran sama gue. Kita sering main dulu, walopun usianya beda jauh. I mean, lebih tepatnya bukan main sih.... tapi gue yang diasuh sama mereka. Terus, I found out mereka udah nikah dan punya krucils, so cute...... and both of them are now a stay-at-home mother. How cool, right?! Nah, gue punya foto sama mereka pas masih bayi, nih fotonya:

dimas, kembar ka deva-devi dan the lil me

Terus, jadi keterusan buka-buka album lama gue yang masih kecil deh barusan

MINI ME!!!!

Fajar, adek ibu yang cuma beda 2 tahun sama nido. Dia suka jail dari kecil :""

Like a sibling banget. I really love him... sekarang dia udah kerja IT guy tapi concern-nya masalah networking gitu. May Alloh always bless him.

With Icus yang masih bayi! I was like 4 yo back then


Me dan ayam KFC! Pertama kalinya makan KFC tuh hahahaha, dibeliin Pa'cik Malik (adek ayah) kalo ga salah :")


Bersama ibu, di nikahannya Bu Evi (adiks ibu). Ibuku memang definisi akhwat cantik, sederhana nan pintar banget emang parahdah, putih cakep kurus pinter alim. idaman bgt parah, ga kayak w ha-ha-ha. KENAPA YA W GA MIRIP IBU W AJA KAN CAKEP #yeu :)))


bapak w yang tarbiyah banget parah. dulu liqo-nya dikejar-kejar polisi gitu ngumpet2 jadiny WKWKWK sekarang mah..... NU banget masya Alloh :))))) #gapapah isi notes peninggalan kuliahnya di MIPA UI hanyalah isi kajian & mars-mars islami gitu. w pas kecil dinyanyiin nasyid "ghuroba" mulu sampe apal banget sekarang wqwqwq

Ayah dan ibu ketika masyih muda, di rumah nenek apin.

Dari membuka album lama, gue punya 2 hal yang harus selalu gue ingat:

I will make both of my parents happy, and there's no happiness greater than jannah itself
I will raise my children really good, I can't wait to have them!

Terimakasih, ibu. Yang membesarkan khoirun dengan sangat teramat baik. Makasih ibu udah rajin makan makanan yang bergizi, makan ikan, makan bubur kacang ijo dengan rajin sampe temen-temen iri sama rambut khoirun *najis* *self-praising*. Makasih ibu udah kasih ASI 2 tahun full walopun sambil kerja-kuliah dan dulu mah gada yang namanya kulkas di rumah kita ya? hahaha. Dan yang paling bikin ku terharu adalah, knowing the fact that ibu lagi kuliah S1 di UI pas khoirun masih bayi hahahah. Yaampun! Ngebayanginnya aja aku gakuat. Sekarang aja w yang gapunya anak (sounds wrong), udah momati gitu kuliahnya. Ini, lagi kuliah banget loh punya bayi... mana gapunya komputer pada masanya...... harus ke rental, terus tugasnya gw pipisin pula :"/
Tapi, mungkin itu yang bisa bikin aku suka belajar kali yah. Masih bayi aja ku kerjaannya bobo sama buku kuliahan, mantep banget ga tuh. Tapi sekarang lagi malesy belajar gimana dong.

Trimakasi juga, ayah, for everything. Ayah yang suka ngajarin khoirun matematika dari dulu, ya walopun kalo ku tanya tambah-tambahan, ngajarinnya sampe ke integral segala ku pusing. Dan, menjadi asisten dosen kalkulus I di tahun 2014 kemarin itu sebuah achievement yang luarbiasa buatku, it's like a gift to you. Your daughter finally jadi asdos matematika! hahaha. Makasih juga, Yah, udah sering banget bawa-bawa khoirun pas ngajar di Nurul Fikri dulu, maupun private lainnya ke rumah-rumah orang kaya yang cuma bisa bikin gw bengong. Paling inget, dulu ayah ngajar marshanda ya hahahahaha, sama anaknya siapa tuh yang punya partai golkar di daerah menteng. Dulu kalo diajak ngajar, rasanya syeneng banget karena pasti dikasih cokelat-cokelat enak yang ga pernah ku temukan di kampung rambutan wkwk. Trus bantuin meriksa kerjaan mahasiswa, w masih inget kalo ayah emang agak tendesius wkwkk "wah namanya islami, tambahin ah nilainya". WKWKWK parahdah :))

I've been in a position when I totally do not want to work at all after graduate. But, remembering you two makes me realized what's been written on my lists. I will tryna be a lecturer and researcher, bismillaah. I will work so that I can check my lists for you two! :)

Sisi lainnya, ku yakin banget krucilskuw pasti lucuw, gendats, pintar, dan menggemashkan. Ku akan rajin makan makanan bergizi (mulai dari sekarnag kali ya mbak HAFT yang sehat makanya), ku akan makan bubur kacang ijo tiap hari biar kamu pinterrrr dan kalo kamu ciwi, kamu ga harus pake pensil alis kaya teman-teman ibu sekarang ya nak wkwkwkwk (#digampar). Ku akan berusaha jadi superrrrmom :") :") We will rock the world together \m/

I will likely work as a lecturer and researcher (aamiin). That doesn't mean I don't love you, krucilsnya ibu. I have been in a position where I wanna be a super career woman who runs the world, but then I realize something..... I will have you, insya Alloh. Eraku sudah "selesai" saat kamu lahir ke dunia. Aku ga akan ambis buat diri sendiri karena it will be your turn! I will teach you to achieve your dreams, to be what you wanna be! Jadi, that's why sekarang ku puas-puasin ikut banyak lomba, kegiatan, dll.... ya karena ini masaku. Tapi nanti, kalo krucils udah ada.... ya itu masanya krucils. #EHEK :>
But yap, I will still work. Because I am not your mom only, I am my parents' first daughter.... and they need me :) Tapi tapi, ibu berusaha buat ga ambis kok kerjanya. makanya gamau kerja kantoran (YA ALLOH AAMIIN) karena bakalan banyak makan waktu banget.

dear krucil, will u look like me when I was a baby?

Imagine you will have a cute little hooman on earth who is a half you and half person you love :">

M: Mak, sejak kapan na udah ga cute lagi? Masih bayi cute banget padahal
M: Sekarang cute kok, tapi kalo lagi males ga cute"
*nyengir kuda* *belom nyuci*
N: na kalo punya anak pasti lucuw banget paraaah
M: udah ngomongin anak aja, kamu aja belom punya pacar
*STABBED* *sedih* *dibahas mulu kejombloan ini*
N: Ohya katanya mas L (sodara) mau nikah loh! *kode-kode mengangkat tema*
M: iya desember katanya. kenapa ya dia mau nikah? umurnya baru 24 padahal, masih muda banget. harusnya kan explore diri dulu, jalan-jalan dulu
N: *glek* *dalam hati nangis* *oh nooo ku gamau nikah tua-tua Ya Alloh* yaaa, berarti dia mau explorenya berdua, ma... lebih seru kaliiii
M: iya kali ya. ohya, if someday you will have children and move out from this house, I wanna carry and take care of them... I will drive them to school
N: *nahan nangis, terharu* yaaay, tapi kalo lagi nyetir dan berantem sama mobil lain, jangan teriak2 yang macem-macem ya mak wkwkwk
M: ya ngga laah. after school I will ask them 'let's go to ancol! do you wanna swimming pool in ancol??'
N: *rolling on the floor* *laugh so damn hard* HAHAHAHAHA

maksud beliau itu: do you wanna swim in ancol gitu tapi malah swimming pool wkwkwkw.
Ohya, We do talk to each other in english very often. IDK why, she said she wanted to sharpen her convo skill by practicing with meh. Soalnya gue sering bilang sama beliau kalo i probably will get married will bule, atau kalopun engga... i'm sure I will raise my children with english, bahasa, and (hopefully) arabic :)))

Yaudah sekian curhatan khoirun malam ni.
Doain punya lakik dulu aja deh sekarang mah, laki aja belom ada.
Capek juga ya skrg blog khoirunnida isinya dia dan pemikiran marriagenya wkwkwk #okaybye :)))))

Ttd,

Khoirunnida yang belom mau nikah sebenernya.

0Comments

, by Khoirunnida

In soul journey,

Can being nice make you depressed?

I've read an article titled "How being nice can make you depressed", here it is:

There is such a thing as being too nice, too giving and too caring.

To overcome depression you must stop the habit of bending over to gain people’s approval. I know, it’s easier said than done. But no one said it’d be easy…

Those who are affected by depression tend to be people-pleasers. And yet, ironically, quite often they are viewed by others as selfish and self-centered…

For over three decades I believed in that crap myself. I believed I was selfish and self-involved. I was convinced I had nothing to offer. I also thought that it didn’t matter what I thought. That my opinion was less important than anyone else’s. It seemed as if I was always living someone else’s life.
Finally, after two major brain seizures caused by a suicide attempt, I stopped living someone else’s life and looked deep within…
Someone Else’s Life
I was the child who was “too young to understand things” and therefore to make decisions. My life was run by the grown ups, who weren’t able to see the serious damage caused by the primitive belief such as; “children should be seen but not heard.”

Then later, I became an young adult, clinging to any guy who’d find anything whatsoever appealing in me. At that time my looks seemed to have the only value in the eyes of others.

I wasn’t myself. I wasn’t who I am. I was a “slave” to anyone who was willing to have me in their life. The fear of rejection always steered my thoughts into the direction that led others to benefit from it more than I did.

How tiring was that! How exhausting it is having to constantly put others before your own self! And how little reward you get at the end of it…

All this, so you can can keep deluding yourself that someone cares about you, at least enough to stick around. For a while, at least…. ’till they get tired of it.

Then what do you do when the inevitable happens and when they leave? You blame yourself, of course. Consciously, or subconsciously, your already low self-esteem gets reinforced. It spirals downward in a lightening speed and you get even more depressed, thinking that there is no tomorrow for you…

Well, there is. And it’s a bright one, too!

You’ve heard the phrase: “You teach people how to treat you” but you’ve ignored it so far. Maybe because when you did try to stand up for yourself it always seemed to have back fired. You might even had finally snapped and told others to fuck off, which they deserved to hear, only to find yourself being labeled as too aggressive and not “lady-like.”

Well dear, who the fuck gives a damn? Who cares what others think and, or say? Let me just remind you – it shouldn’t be you. There is only one person in this entire world whose opinion should matter to you, and that is YOU and you ONLY.

There is only one person in this entire Universe that needs your pleasing, and that person is you.

There is only one person who needs your caring the most, and yes, you’ve guessed it – it’s you again.

Just remember this: if you care too much – others will care too little… If you remain too available – others will always remain too busy for you. Without even being apologetic about it, people will always make you wait for them, making you feel as if your time is not nearly as valuable as theirs. You get the picture…

You will encounter resistance from those around you when you start making those long-overdue changes, but that’s OK. Have fun with it. See that sense of amusement on their faces and that sense of disbelief… Stare back at them without blinking.

Be prepared to deal with the consequences of having the courage to do what’s right for you. In your mind let go of the fear of not having that job in case your boss decides to fire you. Maybe it means it’s time to do something else for a living.

Be ready to let go of your significant other if s/he continues to refuse to treat you in a new, more loving and respectful way.

Make yourself OK with being alone for now. Make yourself comfortable with being with… YOU. Get to know yourself. Find out exactly what your needs and desires are and then become unstoppable in fulfilling them! Be selfish. They’ve accused you of it so many times before, now it’s time for you to show others how selfish you can really be! Show them that you mean business…

Renounce the guilt. Let go of it. Completely. It’s time to release it.

Be your number one. Be bold. Be spontaneous. Learn to be yourself in every situation and around everyone.

This is how you start to love yourself…

----------
I read the article twice. Two weeks ago and just now.
Two weeks ago, I read that with a sad feeling inside of me, affected by environment. And yes, you can guess, I completely agreed with the article. I thought I was going to give up being nice, and i wanna just be a fuck-off lady who doesn't give any damn to people around.

But then, I read the article just now with a fine feeling.
And I disagree.
I mean, being nice is not something I do to please others. Being nice is a need for my own self. I just love being nice, eventho I sometimes am not. I don't care whether people will treat me nice back or not.

And yup, there is no such as thing as being too nice. We all are just nice, not too nice. Because sometimes, we are selfish too. But that's okay because we all are a human afterall. We seek for love, we seek for acceptance, we hate, we are angry, etc. But that doesn't mean we have to stop being nice.

So, if any of you have felt depressed just because you think you are being too nice to people, it's okay. You are a human, afterall. But do not make yourself suffered much. Stay cool. Stay alive. Release the feeling. Stand up for yourself. Speak up. Love yourself. Keep going. Keep being nice!

Afterall, Being nice is a happiness. And happiness is a parfume you can not pour on others while not pouring on yourself first :)

//Khoirunnida tumben lagi bener,
Abis ke madinah agency beli buku Fiqh wanita&Taman-taman orang yang jatuh cinta dan memendam rindu-nya Ibn Qoyyim Al-Jauziyyah//
//WKWKWK//