- Talking things related to career ain't that easy. Deep down, I am still that kind of girl who wants to pursue a very bright career path; running the world. But, I am content enough with what I have right now. I love my job and the barakah in it which Allah has given. Shodaqta Yaa Rasulullaah.. It is very true that rizq...

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How is life going on? Fine. Life is awesome. It is more peaceful, and should be. What do you do in these recent days? Almost like what I always did: assisting class, assessing students' homeworks, watching funny videos on youtube, liking silly posts on Instagam, mumbling everything in my head on twitter, crying over sad videos on youtube. Anything new? I am preparing...

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In the name of Alloh Jalla Jalaluhu, Sometimes I want to feel like drowning in my tears and complicated mind. I am exhausted. I feel like giving up on my own self.  But, this is what it is: life. The worldly life; the prison; the place where I don't belong. How could I expect everything to be good if this life had been...

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Currently seeing my mom's face while she is sleeping. Heart breaking. I know she is so tired. I know life is hard for her. I just want her to be happy. And there is no greater happiness than jannah. How I wish Alloh will reunite me and all of my family in jannah. Without having to go thru hell before :'( So, dear my...

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Got chance to spend this beautiful friday with a best friend of mine. The one and only girl who can remind me about akhirah, in a fun and crazy way. I love her for the sake of Him. so much. She accepts me for who I am. for my ideology (who definitely is the same with her), my nasty thoughts, my dark humors,...

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After weeks having dziness, I finally went to hospital and found out my dizziness had been being caused by a very low level HB of mine. I need to take vitamins everyday. So long, my imagination living as a skinny human being! Yes, doctor said, for the rest of my life, I can't do diet. Once I lose kilograms, my immune system level...

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I personally thank the Governor of Jakarta, Ahok, for finally making me realized how I have gone too far, in a bad way. Tho' I have been losing my boundary recently, there is still a super tiny light in my heart which was then triggered by you, Mr. Ahok. You made me realized how hard my heart became til I couldn't even get...

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Today's sadness: I happened to (kinda) hit a motorcycle in front of me. I got very tired in the morning. The kind of tired I felt when I was about to get hospitalized last year. Scared me to the bone. I had a very very bad time on tanjakan parkiran Gramedia depok. It was damn embarrassing, making me want to cry (my driving...

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God sent me so many blessings. Therefore, I have to focus reaching my dreams and removing all the negativity in my mind. How the f do I have time to think about cheesy things when there are so many people dying outside? I know I can not solve all this world's problems.  But, in this academic way I take, God... please let me do...

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For the first time in forever, I have this very huge fear about my self. The kind of fear that creates butterfly on my stomach, making me like I want to puke. Friends asked me several questions last night, and I actually didn't know if what I answered was me or not. I know nothing about who I am.  Maybe. Just maybe. I...

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"Look at me, I am lonely and I love it," said moon. ...

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Another night like those days Since I was a child, I had never been into any group or circle of friends. I trust almost none. Up until now, I can count people whom I trust with only one of my hands. The one and only way people can understand why I am like this is by knowing my whole life story. But only...

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Everyone's off on a mission  some that are simple to see like mending an age old division  or saving a cat from a tree  but some are more subtle  all folded and rolled like warming a heart that is been left in the cold or starting from scratch when you've all but retired or learning the difference between scared and inspired or counting...

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Life is ups and downs. You've spent almost 4 hours talking with your work mates: talking, laughing, playing games, feeling happy. But then, darkness suddenly hit in you on the face. Same feeling, over and over again. Truth is, it feels painful sometimes.  But, more often, it doesn't feel like a pain anymore because I am very used to it. This issue belongs...

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One fine day, you are sitting on the comfort chair in a college lab. Looking back things you have done today: making writing progression of your paper, reading discrete math books, doing IELTS exam simulation, assisting students in doing their linear algebra tasks, this and that. You feel cool in your own way. This is what you always have been wanting. This is...

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I am a bad girl. I am a sinner. But, tears can not stop when I look at such as picture. The picture of Your home. The picture where Rosulullaah sholallahu 'alaihi wa sallam started giving da'wah. The city where everyone goes back to You. Will You call me to visit baitullaah someday, O Allah Azza wa Jalla? O Allaah.. take this sinful...

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A very happy news I got today: I found my self losing 4 kilograms in these last 22 days. This is a work almost-paid-off for my self. But, almost is never enough. According to my plan, I need to lose some kilos more. I can't wait to wear dress and not feeling like I am a plastic bag or matryoshka doll. God, I...

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which is, The most exciting yet scary part of my graduation preparation is: the dress. You might see me as not the type of a fashionista girl. I only wear what I want to wear on daily basis, whether it is my 6 old years shirts, my almost-everyday black dress, or what ever. But, deep down inside, I am so in love with...

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Dan mengabdi Tuhan. Dan mengabdi bangsa. Dan negara Indonesia. Genap empat tahun akhirnya diri ini berhasil lulus dari Universitas Indonesia. Hal yang begitu membanggakan, haru, dan penuh perjuangan. Acara wisuda tanggal 26 lalu bukan hanya menjadi seremonial biasa untuk hidup saya. Bukan hanya mengundang orang tua, mendengarkan pidato rektor, bersorak gembira melihat IPK-IPK tertinggi dari masing-masing fakultas. Pada hari itu, janji wisudawan diucapkan....

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Finally! Just managed to create a life-time financial guideline for my self. I am so happy and excited! I have already had one before, but the new version is more detailed. It was triggered by the shocking fact that driving car in Jakarta really costs a lot of money, at least for a fresh graduate with so-so income like me. The benzine, the...

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In to the light, we disappear / The lights went off the day we die // And aren’t we all just a dust / Fading in the air / Aren’t we all, aren’t we all / For all that we are, just a dust / Fading in the air / Aren’t we all, aren’t we all? // In to the light, this chapter ends / Two men will come, tell...

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There was a time that I cursed the curse that lay upon my veins. Wild spirit chained Flaming fire quenched over and over ’til it can consume no more ’til it can arise no more with passions that blaze within my soul… I’ve cursed my curse and then I realized – I’ve also cursed my gift. ...

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There will always be a day or two in a month when you feel like doing nothing. In such as day(s), a particular pain is killing you slowly, literally to the bone. Everything looks so messy. People around you seem to be more annoying than usual. Your life is just so wrong in so many levels. The only thing that could save your...

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I have so many words inside my mind to write, but I feel like I have no power to even type it here. Shodaqta Yaa Rosulullaah Sholallahu'alaihi wa sallam. Indeed death cuts off all the pleasure in this dunya. Abu Hurayra reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “Remember frequently the thing that cuts off pleasures,”...

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Almost every beauty channel on YouTube has a segment called months favorites. In that segment, the YouTuber tells their favorite products on past month. Since I am a hard-core fan of beauty channel on YouTube, I decided to make such as segment on this blog. The difference is, I don’t make this segment about beauty products only. I will talk about anything I...

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